… And I fell in love.

I spent three hours writing the perfect poem; tweaking the verses, deleting and undoing, searching my mind and thesaurus for all the right words…

Then another seven days timing, recording and listening to myself, memorising the words and still mixing them up, pacing and reciting, before a mirror making sure I got my expressions right…

But when I stood on that stage for two minutes, I knew I was hooked.

That rush of energy,

That strangely beautiful catharsis,

Those cheers,

They sealed it for me… 

And I fell in love.

With spoken word poetry.

I spoke the Truth…

In fact, ‘we’ spoke the truth.
We said everything, as it happened, and we were at peace. We knew that our truth would be enough.

Then he came and told all kinds of lies and they believed him. He twisted our truth and made us look like the liars.
Because our truth was so simple yet unbelievable. And his lies, they were numerous. 

It did not matter how much we cried. They said tears were not a proof of honesty. If anything, they were meant for camouflage. When we kept silent, they said it was because we had run out of ‘lies’ to tell. When we spoke, they said ‘here come the lies again…’

We got hurt and bitter, and we wanted to fight. We wanted to beat them up and break the spell he had put on them. But we were small and they were big; age wise, size wise, everything wise.

So we just let go. We prayed for one another and we trusted that God would make them see the truth. Our truth.

We will not give them permission to hurt us anymore. Let them talk. Let them judge. But our hearts will not be shaken, we’ll keep our peace.
They may throw us out. They may not. I don’t know and I don’t care.

I know only one little thing:
We spoke the truth, ALL of it.

Two Truths I’ve learned about Singleness

1. Single means ‘Whole’

To me, Singleness is not just that period of time when you’re not in a relationship. 

It is the time when you work at being whole, body and soul. It is the time you have to introspect, evaluate yourself and get better at being you. It is the time when you rid your mind of all the junk from past relationships, be they yours or others’. It is the time you get to figure out your uniqueness; who you’ll be and what it is you’d be bringing into the next relationship. It is the time to eat healthy, keep fit, develop self discipline, solid character and good habits. The time to learn and master independence and interdependence. It is the time to really love yourself so that you can eventually be able to really love someone else, and teach them how to best love you.

2. Singleness = ‘Purity’

You might want to call it ‘Abstinence’. 

I personally believe that if you’re single, then be single. Because in giving yourself to different people here and there, they each get a part of you, and by the time you’re giving yourself to the one, you’re no longer giving a complete version of you. 

 Note to singles:

Singleness is NOT synonymous to Loneliness. You have family, friends, colleagues. Enjoy these relationships as much as you can. Add value, make a difference. The ‘love of your life’ will always come.

The Things They Carry

So I’m writing my first story; the first one I’m determined to finish, and now I’m at the character profiling stage. Yay!

The most important thing I’ve learned about creating good characters is making them relatable. As such I need to ask these questions about my main characters:

-Can they exist in real life?

-Can I relate to their goals and motivations?

-Do I emphathise with them? Am I rooting for them to achieve those goals in spite of the odds?

If I can answer YES to all these questions, then I’m on the right path to having a great character.

But here’s one other interesting question I found to be essential in creating great characters.

-What do they carry?

I had to answer this question literally. What do they carry on their person? In their purses? Wallets? Pockets?

I realised that the things people carry say volumes about who they are, without the writer having to spell it out. For example, I always carry an umbrella and a shawl in my bag no matter the season or weather condition. I believe that says I always want to be prepared for the unexpected. It shows that I’m a planner and I always have a plan B; I can get as far as Plan E. It also shows that I am cautious and can also be very pessimistic. 

I could go on and on just with the umbrella and shawl but you get the point.

The things they carry

Even little things such as a lighter, green lipstick, or an old faded note, have big things to say about those who carry them.

Quote: Tell me what your character carries and I will tell you who they are.  – Glory Mafor ๐Ÿ˜‰

Food for thought: What do you carry and what does it say about you?

When you’re like…

She looked at me and was like,

“What were you thinking when you called him?”

And I was like, 

“Like seriously? Like what are you talking about?”

Then she like rolled her eyes at me, and I hate that. Like, you know, when she looks at me like she’s so much better than me.

Then she’s like “You what? Like, you mean you don’t know what I mean? Like really?”


Yeah… That’s how silly we sound when we say “like” after every three words,  in places where it doesn’t even make sense. 

Guys let’s be ‘like’ more conscious about our language. ๐Ÿ˜‰